Lesson For The Week (Feb. 22)

Resolving Conflicts
Remember this, my dear friends! Everyone must be quick to listen, but slow to speak and slow to become angry. (James 1:19)

Getting Started
Who is someone you don’t get along with? How do you deal with that person?

Resolving conflicts is a challenge we all have to face. When we are angry and hurt, we sometimes say things we don’t mean. Sometimes we don’t say anything at all, and just keep our anger inside. The Bible tells us we should “speak the truth in a spirit of love” (Ephesians 4:15) when we have conflicts with each other. This can be really hard! How can we learn to resolve our conflicts, and make our relationships stronger? How can we tell people they have hurt us, without hurting them?

Vocabulary
get along (v phr) – to have a good relationship with someone
resolve (v) – to bring to a usually successful conclusion
conflict (n) – fighting; struggle between persons, ideas, or interests
competitive (adj) – describes a person who always wants to win or be the best
blind (adj) – unable to see
deceive (v) – to trick someone; to be dishonest
mourn (v) – to be sad because someone has died
favor (n) – friendly feelings towards someone; approval

Reading God’s Word

There is a story in the Bible of two brothers, Jacob and Esau. Like many brothers, they were very competitive, and they both wanted to be their father’s favorite son. One day when their father was very old and blind, he decided to give Esau a special blessing. Jacob was jealous, and he tricked his father into giving him the blessing instead of Esau.

Genesis 27:34-35; 41

34 When Esau heard this, he cried out loudly and bitterly and said, "Give me your blessing also, father!" 35 Isaac answered, "Your brother came and deceived me. He has taken away your blessing."…41 Esau hated Jacob, because his father had given Jacob the blessing. He thought, “The time to mourn my father’s death is near; then I will kill Jacob.”

Jacob knew his brother wanted to kill him. He ran far away from home and lived with his uncle. For many years he was afraid to go home, because he thought Esau would try to kill him. Finally, after many, many years away from home, he sent a message to his brother. He told Esau he was coming home, and asked Esau to forgive him.

Genesis 32:6-8

6 When the messengers came back to Jacob, they said, "We went to your brother Esau, and he is already on his way to meet you. He has four hundred men with him." 7 Jacob was frightened and worried. He divided into two groups the people who were with him, and also his sheep, goats, cattle, and camels. 8 He thought, "If Esau comes and attacks the first group, the other may be able to escape."

Genesis 33:3-4
3 Jacob went ahead of them and bowed down to the ground seven times as he approached his brother. 4 But Esau ran to meet him, threw his arms around him, and kissed him. They were both crying. . . 10 Jacob said, "No, please, if I have gained your favor, accept my gift. To see your face is for me like seeing the face of God, now that you have been so friendly to me. 11 Please accept this gift which I have brought for you; God has been kind to me and given me everything I need." Jacob kept on urging him until he accepted.

Taking a Closer Look
1. How did Jacob deceive his brother? (Genesis 27:35)
2. How did Esau feel about Jacob when he found out what Jacob had done? What did Esau plan to do? (Genesis 27:41)
3. When Esau went to meet Jacob, who did he bring with him? (Genesis 32:6)
4. Why was Jacob worried and afraid? (Genesis 32:6,8)
5. When Jacob saw Esau, what did he do? (Genesis 33:3)
6. What did Esau do? (Genesis 33:4)
7. Why do you think Esau chose to forgive Jacob?
8. Why is it so hard to forgive?

Taking Action
1. Nobody likes to argue or fight, but we all do it sometimes. An argument does not have to be a big problem. It becomes a problem if we become angry and say unkind things. How can we disagree with someone in a positive way?
2. Think about someone you have a conflict with. What are some things you can say or do to fix your relationship?

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